November 30, 2023


Science Of Woman

Episode #173: The 12 Week 12 months

39 min read

This week, we’re doing a deep dive into a subject that we’ve referenced many instances on this present—the e book The 12 Week Year. So if you’re within the temper to speak about aim setting, then this episode is for you!

Plus, we’re going to speak in regards to the High Five Test.

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Present Notes

Why a 12-week aim is healthier:

-Lengthy deadlines can really feel very daunting and result in procrastination.

-You’ll be able to break up your targets into seasons so that you do extra work on them when you’ve extra time and fewer if you end up busier.

The vital components of the 12-week 12 months:

-Making your imaginative and prescient (ensure it’s clear and measurable).

-Develop your plan (break up your aim right into a sequence of small targets).

-Accountability and retaining rating

-Checking in

Check out

Elsie’s prime 5 strengths:


Emma’s prime 5 strengths:

-Focus Knowledgeable

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Episode 173 Transcript:

Emma: You’re listening to The Lovely Mess Podcast, your cozy consolation pay attention. This week we’re doing one other deep dive into a subject that we’ve referenced many instances on this present. It’s the e book, the 12 Week 12 months. So when you’re within the temper to speak about aim setting, this episode is for you. And we’re additionally gonna speak just a little bit in regards to the Excessive 5 take a look at, which we’re gonna discuss our outcomes, Elsie’s outcomes, my outcomes, and how one can take the take a look at when you’re . 

Elsie: I’ll clarify the general idea of the 12 Week 12 months. So the 12 week 12 months is a aim setting technique that goes by quarter. So 12 weeks is one quarter, proper? 

Emma: Yeah, it’s three months. 

Elsie: Yeah. So 12 weeks is each three months. The factor I like about that is once you set your targets only for the brand new 12 months, the start of every 12 months. Initially, it may be like a procrastination factor the place you don’t have an excellent stable January, that form of occurs to me yearly. You’re like, I didn’t actually obtain my aim in January, so I suppose I’m simply not going to have an ideal 12 months this 12 months.

Emma: So I suppose I’ll simply wait, surrender for subsequent January.

Elsie: Proper. So once you do it each three months, you simply have 4 instances the contemporary begins, 4 instances extra contemporary begins than you do annually, which I like. And the opposite factor is that almost all targets that you just wish to obtain in a 12 months, you really may obtain or make main headway in simply three months. You don’t really want a 12 months for many targets, and even when you do want a 12 months, you’ll be able to at the least do one a part of your aim then do the following half. Part them off in your subsequent quarter? I feel that the twelfth week 12 months was actually, actually useful for me, it’s only a mindset shift. And I like New 12 months’s targets personally. I’m not a type of individuals who’s like, I’m not a decision individual. I’m positively a decision individual. I’ll at all times take an opportunity to set a aim. . However I feel that that is simply extra sensible and it really works higher. And the opposite factor that they do so much within the 12 week 12 months is behavior monitoring. So there’s loads of journaling and loads of like monitoring of your progress. And that’s one thing that works actually good for my character as a result of I form of just a little little bit of a perfectionist factor the place if I don’t do one thing daily, then I really feel like that I’ve already failed. And with the ability to see that doing one thing three to 5 instances per week is in some methods higher as a result of it’s like doable as a substitute of unattainable, and it’s simply nearly as good as doing one thing daily. I feel that having requirements that you would be able to by no means obtain might be one of many largest enemies of success that many people have. Yeah, I discovered the e book. For those who haven’t learn it, I’d positively suggest it, however you’ll be able to in all probability additionally simply hearken to this episode and take like the principle excessive factors from it as a result of it’s fairly easy.

Emma: Yeah, it’s fairly easy. And it’s not a protracted e book too. So the 12 week 12 months has like an internet site the place you may as well join a e-newsletter and I’ve signed up for it years and years in the past. It’s form of a type of newsletters the place they’ll ship like ideas and tips right here and there or form of like check-ins, issues like that. So anyway, I prefer it. If I don’t have time, I don’t learn ’em. But when I’ve time and I do learn them, I normally discover them like useful. So anyway, when you’ve got any curiosity in that, simply so you understand that’s obtainable, it’s free. Okay. So I used to be simply gonna go forward and go over just a few issues which are form of just like the case for a brief deadline , as a result of that’s just about it. Is the 12 week years like, Hey, let’s have shorter deadlines as a substitute of this 12 months lengthy deadline. Sure, and I feel so many of those you form of already hit on along with your synopsis of the 12 week 12 months, and I feel that’s form of fascinating. So I’ll undergo these form of rapidly, however be happy to elaborate if you wish to, however yeah. Okay, so lengthy deadlines can actually simply result in loads of procrastination. If you understand you’ve an entire 12 months to do one thing and perhaps you don’t really want a 12 months to do it, then you definately’ll find yourself procrastinating. So you find yourself being like, oh, I’ll get to it, after which come October you’re like, oh crap, I higher actually work on this aim as a result of I’m all over the 12 months and you possibly can have simply accomplished it rapidly after which moved on to your subsequent factor. Additionally, I feel lengthy deadlines can typically imply that our priorities or our life actually modifications, and I don’t learn about you, however that’s the place I get actually hung up, is that if I’ve made a aim after which my life actually does change and it makes extra sense for me to alter that aim. Generally I get it in my head that I’m giving up or I failed, or I’m making an excuse to not end my aim when the reality is that this aim simply doesn’t serve me anymore as a result of I made it six months in the past and my life was completely different six months in the past. 

Elsie: I’ve this drawback actually dangerous, with the ability to settle for placing a pause button on targets has been very useful for me. Earlier than that, I actually had the mindset that if I wasn’t doing every part proper now, like if somebody says, how’s your pottery going? Proper now, I haven’t made pottery for greater than a month, I’d really feel like panicked in like a failure. However now, that I’ve my pause button in place and I do know that like we’re displaying our home completely consistently and that’s why I can’t get my pottery stuff out as a lot as I needed to, I used to be leaving it out for months at a time. It’s simply not my productive season for that proper now and will probably be once more sooner or later. There’s loads of good thoughts stuff, extra mindset stuff on this e book, particularly for individuals who might be like very exhausting on your self or like an all or nothing character.

Emma: Yeah, I feel that it’s loads of mindset modifications and actually optimistic ones usually. As a result of, yeah, there’s simply loads of guilt that may come into aim setting and I actually suppose that’s not useful, so discovering methods to do away with that’s actually good. Okay, so one other factor, lengthy deadlines may really feel actually daunting. So when you actually do make a aim that’s gonna take you a 12 months to perform it, it’s in all probability a extremely massive aim. Until you break it down into small targets, you’re in all probability gonna really feel overwhelmed, and that may even result in you giving up. So alongside these strains, I feel lengthy deadlines, after they’re accomplished efficiently, they actually simply are a sequence of brief deadlines. For those who’re your aim is, like Elsie loves pottery, I’m making an attempt to jot down a e book. So if I’m like, my aim is to jot down a e book, it’s like, okay, properly the 1st step is like define, step two, chapter one, you understand, nevertheless many chapters, it’s a sequence of small targets alongside the best way. And so I feel the 12 week 12 months in some methods is simply an acknowledgement that in an effort to accomplish one thing massive in a 12 months or 5 years or no matter, you’re on the deadline. You’re simply gonna have a bunch of small targets alongside the best way, and so that you may as properly simply consider it as, okay, properly what’s my 12 week plan right here as a result of I bought three months to do X, Y, Z. So this type of ties into all of it, however I like quarterly targets partly as a result of I feel, and I particularly suppose this for our work, there’s simply completely different components of the 12 months. Perhaps it’s as a result of I dwell someplace with the 4 Seasons, perhaps it’s as a result of I’ve a child, and so like college and daycare might be completely different at completely different instances and there’s holidays. I don’t know. However for me, I really feel like I can actually go loopy for work in Q1 and Q2 after which Q3 and this fall there’s, there may be loads of work, however there’s much more like household time and holidays and issues like that. And I like with the ability to form of consider issues in that method. So then I don’t really feel dangerous in let’s say this fall, I’m not working fairly as a lot cuz I’ve loads of vacation stuff going if I form of knew that and I actually busted my in Q1 and q2, now I’m like, oh, I’m on observe. You understand, my targets in This fall are usually not as profession, they’re extra household cleansing the home, preparing for friends, no matter, they’re extra in that vary. And I can have that 12 weeks be one thing that is sensible for my 12 months versus this 12 months lengthy aim that has to embody all these completely different seasons, and it nearly doesn’t make sence.

Elsie: I feel that in This fall for our enterprise, we form of do have to enter survival mode yearly as a result of it’s normally once we do nearly all of our advertisements, so that you don’t get to choose your content material as a lot as you do that time of 12 months. Yeah, I utterly agree, which is like advertisements and household stuff.

Emma: Yeah. You’re like, what’s do and what’s occurring with my household? That’s all I’ve time for. You understand, it’s enjoyable, however it’s a sure season and I feel when you’re anticipating to do loads of deep work for the longer term, you’re simply not gonna get to do it that quarter, I by no means do. So anyway, that’s what Q1’s for. So these are form of my case for the brief deadline, so hopefully we’ve swayed you. I really feel like we in all probability did. 

Elsie: I feel everyone seems to be swayed, I positively am, I’d by no means return. I feel that it’s very compelling. There’s actually nothing that’s higher about lengthy deadlines. No, there’s actually nothing.

Emma: No. Yeah, it’s technique. I agree. 

Elsie: Case’s closed. 

Emma: Case’s closed, so all people’s on board, good. Okay, so then I simply needed to speak about, to me the vital components of the 12 week 12 months, some issues he hits on within the e book and issues that may provide help to achieve success as you’re making your targets for the following 12 weeks. Okay, so the primary one is making your imaginative and prescient. How do you determine what to work on? How do you determine what targets you need? Okay, so I feel some issues that assistance is now that you understand that you’ve 12 weeks you is usually a little extra real looking about what you may get accomplished in 12 weeks. So that you’re not essentially going to be making a aim that’s like, I’m going to learn 80 books and go to the health club 100 instances or no matter.You simply know that that’s not gonna occur in 12 weeks. So now you’ll be able to focus just a little extra on what’s real looking to occur in these 12 weeks. And I’d additionally say as you’re making your imaginative and prescient, your targets, I love to do them in a bunch of various areas. So I wish to form of have completely different buckets of like, right here’s my private life, which incorporates like hobbies and self care. And typically additionally like well being and wellness stuff, like going to the health club or no matter. Then I consider household, which is generally stuff with my son, however it’s different issues too. And I form of put mates in there too, so if a buddy’s having a birthday or if a buddy’s going via a tough time, I wanna make time to be there for them or do one thing, and I take into consideration profession. So what am I making an attempt to perform these subsequent 12 weeks at work. Is there one thing that we’re constructing? Is there some form of massive deadline? Is there one thing that I’ve been wanting to start out and end? Or at the least begin, you understand, once more, you solely have 12 weeks. So what are we getting accomplished in these 12 weeks, that form of. So I wish to have completely different buckets that’s how I give it some thought. However one thing that I feel is actually vital once you’re making targets is to be sure that it’s clear and measurable. I feel when you’re like, okay, on the finish of those 12 weeks, let’s say you’re engaged on some psychological well being stuff, you’ve had a tough time and also you’re making an attempt to work on that. Not that that’s essentially me, precisely and I’m simply utilizing myself right here’s an instance, let’s simply say. So when you make the aim, I simply wanna really feel higher in 12 weeks. It’s like, properly, Good aim not precisely very clear. Not precisely very measurable but. What do you actually imply by that? And if it’s like, properly, I wanna really feel higher, I wanna have much less days the place I’m feeling actually down. I wish to really feel extra hopeful. So attempt to outline it just a little bit extra, after which take into consideration what are some issues that you possibly can measure in that as a result of measuring a sense is actually exhausting, that may be very tough. However as a substitute take into consideration like, I wish to ensure I’m going to remedy each month. Okay, so then you definately’re gonna go to remedy thrice within the subsequent 12 weeks, okay? That’s measurable. Nice, you possibly can do this. I wish to spend extra time with mates. I wish to get some sunshine. I wish to work on endorphin stuff. So perhaps that’s, I’m gonna do some cardio, I’m gonna go to the health club. I’m gonna begin operating no matter factor that you just suppose is gonna assist. That is your targets, however make them measurable issues that you would be able to really know when you achieved it or not, when you did it or not. As a result of once you get to the tip of the 12 weeks, you’re gonna take inventory. You’re gonna say, oh, did I make it? Did I get all of the issues accomplished? And it’s not that you just’re making an attempt to make this massive to-do checklist and simply undergo the motions. But when issues aren’t clear and measurable, then it may be actually exhausting to know in case your like, when you get to the tip of the 12 weeks and also you’re like, I don’t really feel higher, then you definately’re gonna wanna know why. So is it that you just did all of the issues and people didn’t assist and now you’ve gotta attempt one thing else? Or is it that you just didn’t do the issues, you bought sidetracked, you bought distracted, perhaps one thing occurred the place you couldn’t, one thing main modified in your life, that occurs. But when it issues aren’t clear and measurable, then it’s gonna be actually exhausting to know why it labored or didn’t work. Okay, in order that’s form of about making your imaginative and prescient. Then the following is when you form of have your imaginative and prescient, develop your plan. So break up your aim right into a sequence of small targets, so issues for every month and even every week. And I feel once you’re desirous about 12 weeks, that is a lot simpler than once you’re desirous about an entire 12 months as a result of typically I’ll make an enormous checklist that’s for the entire 12 months. Elsie and I do that so much for weblog posts, we’re like, right here’s a thousand weblog posts I wanna write as a result of we simply get enthusiastic about concepts. So we at all times have method too many concepts and I like to make an enormous checklist like that. I feel it’s actually enjoyable, it makes me really feel excited. It makes me really feel like the longer term’s filled with potentialities. So I feel that’s train for these causes. Nevertheless it comes to really executing, so this week for instance, I’m sick. So I had at some point the place I used to be mainly off cuz I used to be simply actually sick and couldn’t actually work. So then it’s like, okay, I’m gonna have a look at my checklist and I now have these hundreds of concepts and solely 4 days to work, what may I get accomplished? Whereas as a substitute, when you had these 5 issues to do that week, is there one which that you must take off the checklist since you had been sick. You then simply get to maintain shifting ahead and it simply makes it so much sooner and simpler to comply with if you understand the place you’re going after which you can also make faster changes versus this big, big grasp plan and also you get a barely off track and now you’re tremendous off track.

Elsie: Yeah, I agree. I feel it is a little little bit of time to say my post-it technique. Oh by the best way, Podcast listeners attempt to diagnose me with h ADHD form of so much. I’m like, I do know that I in all probability have ADHD so lI get it. Most likely lots of people have undiagnosed ADHD. So when you’ve got any hassle with focusing, I feel the large checklist, like my weblog publish checklist for the 12 months of what I wanna do, it’s stapled collectively, it’s three pages of typed textual content it like it isn’t one thing that I would like to take a look at each week. So for me to take a look at a small checklist of about 5 issues, like sufficiently small to suit on a post-it is what my mind can deal with after which I can select one thing to really work on. So I feel that when you’re an individual who will get simply overwhelmed by a protracted checklist, simply don’t have a look at the lengthy checklist that usually. Each few weeks you’ll be able to go in and decide some issues from it and hold your self on a small checklist. I feel it’s only a trick you are able to do on your self that basically works. 

Emma: Sure, I agree and I feel too, it simply makes it the place all people’s busy. All of us have limitations in our life, irrespective of for what motive. And I feel that for instance, after I’m writing a e book, as soon as I’ve the define, I instantly really feel method much less overwhelmed as a result of if I’ve two and a half to a few hours the place I can work on this immediately, that’s all I’ve. I’m not gonna get to work on it extra perhaps this complete week,however then I have a look at my define and I’m like, oh, chapter 4 I really feel like I actually have a deal with on that. I’m gonna write that proper now, and I do it after which it’s accomplished. And it’s like that’s one thing that now simply moved my complete venture ahead in a significant method. Did I end the entire e book? No, however did I write a chapter? Sure I did within the time that I’ve. And so, and that’s, , you understand, type of it’s like making an attempt to interrupt down these massive issues that we wanna do in life into smaller chew dimension issues in order that we will really get them accomplished. As a result of life is filled with numerous different issues which are by no means gonna be on our checklist, however we nonetheless must do them, and that’s simply what life’s like and it’s okay. Okay, so develop your plan and that can assist, break down your aim into very small targets. They are often weekly, month-to-month, they’ll even be day by day. I’d say too, don’t really feel like they must be so inflexible as a result of I feel when you do have a really, like each single day this should occur. That doesn’t depart you a lot area for getting sick, or in case your child will get sick or you’ve a snow day or the web goes out at your own home and you may’t work on the factor you had been gonna work on. You need to depart some margin to let life occur, otherwise you’re actually gonna stress your self out, so do this too. 

Elsie: Yeah, concentrate on the large wins for certain. So long as I can get this a part of my checklist accomplished, then the remainder of it’s elective. I feel is an efficient method to consider it. 

Emma: Okay, after which the following factor I wanna discuss I feel varies a lot from individual to individual. So it’s accountability and retaining rating. So that is one thing he talks about within the e book and there’s numerous other ways to do it. And I additionally suppose it actually will depend on you and what works for you. So the entire level is to have mechanisms in place to assist hold your self on observe. Some individuals are very internally motivated or externally motivated, or perhaps they name it intrinsically motivated, I’m undecided. However I’m an individual the place I don’t really want loads of exterior accountability. I’m very very like on the within, if I’ve determined I wanna do one thing that’s it for me, that’s sufficient. I do want methods to maintain myself on observe. For instance, my husband, he has a buddy who he at all times goes to the health club with. It’s not that he by no means goes to the health club by himself, he does, however it helps him so much to have this buddy who he goes with. It’s simply type of an accountability factor. It simply signifies that he is aware of his mates there. If that’s the case, if he’s not there then he’s form of letting him down or that’s in all probability too harsh of a wording, however you understand, one thing alongside these strains. Whereas me, I used to be making an attempt to get again into the health club this 12 months for my psychological well being causes, and so I used to be contemplating becoming a member of this new health club the place all my mates go. I went as soon as and it was actually enjoyable to see everybody. It form of dawned on me thatI’m simply not very externally motivated. I’m a really inner, intrinsically motivated individual, so I really don’t really want somebody there. I simply have to have it in my thoughts that that is vital to me and I have to have purchased into the explanation why, and for me that’s adequate. And as soon as I’ve that, then I simply must form of have my mechanisms to maintain myself on observe. For me, I’m just a little bit extra of a reward system individual. I feel you’re like this too, Elsie. I wish to have just a little reward on the finish of an enormous aim, like as soon as I obtain it then I’m like, oh, I’m shopping for myself this in all probability new jumpsuit or no matter it’s. I’m doing one thing, I’m taking myself out to get my nails accomplished, no matter. I’m just a little extra of a rewards individual and I wish to set these for myself. However yeah, you may be an individual who you actually wish to work with others, perhaps you want engaged on groups. Perhaps you want an accountability companion for sure targets. These are nice instruments and if that’s one thing that helps you, you need to do it. However they’re not essentially for me and I don’t actually suppose they’re for you both,Elise. That’s why we thrive a lot at working alone and being alone so much, however I do like reward techniques. 

Elsie: I like rewards too and for me I feel you’re a pure finisher and I’m not. So for me, I like to seek out one thing to assist me get previous the half the place I failed earlier than, which is normally, relying on what kind of venture, it’s normally the center or round like day 10 when issues get boring. The purpose the place issues get boring, the entire novelty is worn off is normally exhausting for me to get previous. I’m very into beginning one thing. In my life I’ve in all probability began a whole bunch of issues that I did for at some point, which is actually humorous. So, beginning is like my happiest level after which the remainder of it I’ve to maintain myself in some way externally motivated. A rewards system is actually good for me. I feel that I don’t wanna depend on different folks as a result of that’s simply not real looking for my life-style. So I feel I just like the little rewards. Additionally, the opposite factor I actually like is charts the place you coloration in one thing for both every day or every milestone, nevertheless the chart goes. However I actually just like the coloring in charts are very useful for me as a result of when you get to a sure level, it’s like just a little bit addictive to maintain going and identical to get to that utterly full level. However yeah, I feel that the factor I appreciated from the 12 12 months was the half about score your self. I feel it’s just a little bizarre, however I’ve accomplished it earlier than and I really feel like I’m normally just a little bit harsh. Nevertheless it doesn’t actually matter when you’re harsh or beneficiant, so long as you’re constant, form of doesn’t matter. It’s only a technique to hold your self making an attempt to do higher. And I do suppose that having your personal accountability is so significantly better than making an attempt to get another person to carry you accountable. I’ve by no means discovered one other individual holding me accountable to be as efficient and constant as one thing I may do myself.

Emma: I additionally suppose like I simply have an actual, I don’t know a great way to say this, however I don’t actually care what different folks suppose that a lot, if I care what you suppose, then I do and if I don’t, I don’t. That’s simply what I’ve at all times been like. And I feel at instances in my life that served me rather well and at different instances in my life, it’s made it the place I’ve been form of remoted. Nevertheless it’s simply what I’m like. It doesn’t encourage for me as a result of if I’ve determined that’s now not my aim and my accountability companion or no matter was like we’re nonetheless doing this. I’d be like, no, I’m not and I’m identical to not motivated by exterior forces. However on the score factor, I feel it’s just a little bizarre too, however one factor I like about it’s I do suppose it permits extra. I favor a category that’s like, you may get an A or you may get an F and every part in between. I feel go fail is form of nerve-wracking just a little bit. So I like that in, at the least in my world, and score myself, I can provide myself like a stable B minus and be like, Hey, it’s not so dangerous, however you possibly can do higher, I like that. So then it feels such as you’re not a failure. You didn’t fail, however you possibly can perform a little higher. You didn’t get an A and I, I like that as a result of then it’s like, all proper, I’m gonna hold making an attempt, I’m not gonna surrender on this. However I see that there’s some areas the place I can enhance considerably. So I like issues which have loads of scale or loads of grey. I don’t do as properly in like black and white conditions, I suppose. After which actually the very last thing that I needed to speak about with 12 week 12 months was a check-in, the check-in time, which is week 13, so on the finish of your 12 weeks, it’s time to verify in. So a pair issues to consider with that. Clearly, It’s good to simply take time on the finish of this timeframe or any type of aim setting factor to see how you probably did to price your self to simply verify in as a result of I feel loads of instances, at the least for me, perhaps this comes pure for others, however for me, I’m a really ahead shifting individual. I really feel like I can end one thing and I don’t even actually discuss it, and it doesn’t even actually register and I’ll simply hold shifting to the following aim. After which I’ll see a buddy who I haven’t seen in a pair months and they are often like, Hey, did you end writing that novel you had been engaged on? And I’m like, oh yeah, I did. Yeah, that was enjoyable, I’m engaged on this now. That’s what I’m like typically and I feel it’s cool that you’ve loads of targets in life, however you didn’t actually take any time to, one, have fun when you’ve got success, so do this, don’t make that mistake. Rejoice when you’ve successes, as a result of that’s what life ought to be filled with is getting higher and higher at aim setting, at no matter it’s that you just’re desirous to do along with your time. So aside from celebrating your successes, I additionally suppose checking in is an efficient time, particularly when you’re new to the 12 week 12 months to simply form of seeing the way it went. As a result of right here’s the factor, you may get to the tip of 12 weeks and notice, wow, I made method too massive of targets, so I epically failed didn’t get them accomplished, and never as a result of I didn’t attempt actually exhausting however as a result of they had been too massive, they had been an excessive amount of for 12 weeks, and that’s okay, you don’t have to really feel dangerous about that. You simply want to regulate for the following 12 weeks. It’s worthwhile to be extra real looking and you possibly can additionally get to the tip of your 12 weeks and be like, that was form of straightforward. I used to be form of accomplished six weeks via and it’s like you possibly can do extra. You possibly can add extra to your 12 week, to your quarter aim checklist as a result of yours had been too straightforward and that’s okay too however now it’s time to readjust. So long as you’re taking inventory of how the final quarter went, you’re gonna have the ability to higher make targets for the following 12 weeks. And you may as well form of see how did life change? How do you know my targets change or something like that. I additionally had this second, so this occurred to me in January of this 12 months I bought to the tip of the month and I used to be feeling actually down as a result of I had been actually sick. I used to be sick for like two stable weeks. I’ve a toddler, so I’m sick lot, simply type of a part of it. It’s winter, we additionally had some snow days, which was actually enjoyable, however it form of bought me off of a few of my targets of attending to the health club and strolling extra for my psychological well being. However what I did was I used to be feeling actually down after which I form of checked out my to-do checklist that I sustain on my bulletin board in my workplace and it has all my work stuff and I additionally put my private issues on there, simply because I’ve it multi functional place and it’s greater than a post-it like Elsie was speaking about however it’s sufficiently small that I can have a look at it and one fast look and so I like that it retains me on observe and I spotlight it, in order that’s my coloring method of seeing what I bought. .And so I used to be taking a look at it and I noticed that like 90% of it was highlighted. Like I nonetheless bought so much accomplished in January, although I felt actually crappy and I used to be actually sick and I had much more days off than I used to be form of planning on as a result of we had snow days. However I noticed like, Hey, really I’m glad I’m taking this second to take inventory, as a result of really this month went rather well. I bought so much accomplished after I had time to work, I actually busted out and after I didn’t get to work as a result of I used to be sick or we had a snow day, I rested or I performed with my son cuz he was residence and that was cool too, that was obligatory, the resting. Enjoying along with your son’s extra enjoyable than obligatory, it’s not the phrase I’d use, it’s far more enjoyable than obligatory. It’s additionally obligatory, however it’s not identical. 

Elsie: It’s a part of life proper now, for certain. 

Emma: The variety of instances I’ve watched the automobiles films this month is just too many instances, however love you Lightning McQueen. Anyway, so I feel typically having this check-in time, if nothing else, it may form of drive you to understand that you just did a greater job than perhaps you had been pondering, or at the least that’s what I discover occurs for me so much is I feel I’ve these grand concepts and I really get so much accomplished, however it doesn’t at all times really feel so nice within the second. So when you’ve these instances the place you let your self verify in, perhaps you do want to regulate. Perhaps issues went terribly and that you must make some changes, however perhaps additionally issues are higher than you suppose and also you’re simply form of exhausting on your self, which is what I do.

Elsie: My first month went terribly. Yeah, you do want to regulate.

Emma: That’s okay, that’s positive too. It’s not the tip of the world to regulate. Anything? Every other ideas you needed to share in regards to the 12 week 12 months? 

Elsie: Yeah. I feel once you don’t make your targets, I’d say I don’t make my targets like more often than not, and I feel that’s regular, particularly when loads of the targets are one thing massive that you just’ve by no means accomplished earlier than otherwise you tend of placing too many on every checklist. So I feel for the following time, if you’re a aim repeater like me, the place you’re like, I didn’t make that, however I’m gonna attempt once more. Then I feel making some kind of edit to attempt to deal with the ache level. So for myself, my ache level is normally it’s exhausting to get began or it’s exhausting to maintain going as soon as it will get boring, that are each completely different however it’s gonna occur time and again and over for the remainder of my life since you solely get one mind. So I feel discovering little methods to encourage your self previous your ache factors, I feel might be actually good when. You’re in all probability gonna have loads of the identical targets, like time and again all through your years or related at the least. So it’s one thing you’ll be able to positively get higher at, like tricking your personal mind and placing your self in your very best place for achievement. I feel that no matter it’s a must to do for me, the little rewards are good, the little charts, however do no matter it’s a must to do to present your self that very best probability.

Emma: I feel that ought to be a T-shirt, you solely get one mind. 

Elsie: It’s true. There’s so many instances I examine myself to Emma as a result of Emma is sort of a finisher in any respect prices. She finishes every part and I don’t end in all probability like a tenth of the issues that you just do, however I don’t have an opportunity to dwell life along with your mind. So, it’s prefer it doesn’t actually matter, it’s a whole waste of time mainly to check myself to somebody who has completely different strategies. So the one strategies that I can enhance upon are those that work for me. So yeah, I feel simply discover the issues that encourage you and actually use these strategies.

Emma: Yeah, I do suppose there’s not loads of worth in evaluating your self usually, however evaluating your mind since we’re on that matter to different folks as a result of it’s such as you’re not gonna be that individual and doubtless, there’s really loads of strengths to being your self. There’s tons of issues that I want I used to be like, you extra, however I’m not and I’m not gonna be, so I can simply admire them about you and I’ll simply worth the issues about me. Which I do suppose one in all my issues is I do like to complete issues and I like that about myself. There’s different instances I want I used to be just a little extra of a perfectionist, however I’m not and there’s no probability of it. So I simply must know that about myself and simply drive myself to decelerate. Or redo one thing if it must be redone and be extra sincere about that. As a result of I’m simply not a perfectionist and I feel that that’s okay, however it may maintain again my work from being higher than I feel it may very well be at instances. So anyway. Yep, we’re who we’re. Settle for it and develop. 

Elsie: For certain. I feel you actually must embrace what your pure strengths and weaknesses are, after which use this to get just a little bit extra accomplished. However I felt prefer it made an enormous distinction for me. I like the possibility to have extra contemporary begins and yeah, I actually don’t see why beginning an enormous aim solely each January, it doesn’t even make sense as a result of January will not be even the most effective month. It’s positively not my prime for like something. And it’s like additionally for folks like us with little children, it’s such as you’re recovering from the hangover of placing on a magical vacation in your children. Which is so much if your private home so much. 

Emma: I feel too, like most individuals I feel, establish with this like the start a part of any venture and the aim setting time is actually enjoyable. It’s thrilling cuz it’s the dreaming half, such as you’re dreaming of all these belongings you wanna do and so that you get to try this 4 instances a 12 months as a substitute of only one time a 12 months when you do the 12 week 12 months. And that’s, I feel, extra enjoyable. It’s thrice as enjoyable, it’s far more enjoyable. Okay, so I feel that’s about it on that. The following factor I needed to speak about was the excessive 5 take a look at. So if folks haven’t heard of this perhaps simply inform ’em like the way you heard of it, since you despatched it to me, you had been like, take this take a look at, I used to be like, okay. So how did you even hear about it? It’s form of like power finder, however it’s not, I don’t know. 

Elsie: So a listener requested that we do like power finder take a look at and I discovered this take a look at simply by Googling free power finder take a look at. What’s the precise web site? 

Emma: It’s excessive 5 take a look

Elsie: And it was with a quantity 5, excessive quantity 5. take a look Okay, so we did this, these assessments, it’s free. I couldn’t get my husband to do it, however I bought Emma to do it. So , that was half of a win. It offers you a prime 5 strengths and Emma and I had like a number of of the identical strengths which I used to be not anticipating, however then it did make loads of sense. After which those which are completely different additionally make loads of sense. So anyway, ought to we learn what our strengths had been? My prime one is Catalyst, my second one is Optimist, my third is Filo Math, which suggests somebody who likes to be taught. The following one is Thinker, and the final one is timekeeper. This was actually fascinating, I used to be not shocked that I had optimist up actually excessive. I do suppose that’s one in all my strengths and my complete key to success of my complete life is like believing you understand, just like the lady from TikTok who says, How exhausting can or not it’s syndrome, I form of have that and I’ve at all times felt that I may do something that I wish to do in life. And I feel it’s a method my mind was born. After which a love of studying I positively suppose that’s one thing we share. That one’s in your checklist too, proper? Yeah. F 

Emma: Yeah Filo math was my primary.

Elsie: Have been there another ones that we had been sharing? Thinker? That is sensible too after which timekeeper. This one was fascinating as a result of it stated that I mainly appreciated to race myself, which is true. My solely method of getting issues accomplished, it’s nearly like just a little child once you set the timer for them to wash their room, that’s nonetheless how I’m to at the present time about any aim. If I’m not on an aggressive deadline, I’m in all probability not even engaged on it. In order that’s like my complete technique.

Emma: I used to be filo math, timekeeper, focus skilled, deliverer, and thinker. Focus. 

Elsie: Focus Knowledgeable is like the proper technique to describe you as a result of I don’t suppose very many individuals would relate with how properly you focus since you identical to don’t get in your telephone. You simply don’t have a distractable mind the best way that most individuals do. 

Emma: Nicely, I don’t know if that’s wholly true. I positively get on my telephone typically. However Yeah, I do suppose one in all my strengths is I can concentrate on issues. I at all times chalk it as much as that we needed to sit via so many boring sermons rising up, and I simply bought actually good at focusing throughout something. 

Elsie: We had been skilled in highschool, throughout our church years, we had been skilled to be observe takers through the sermons that was like mainly the best way that you just present that you just’re being well mannered and listening and I do suppose that was an especially good behavior of studying easy methods to get essentially the most out. Sermons are at the least in our church, had been extraordinarily boring. I feel we bought essentially the most out of it that we may, at the least you’ll be able to bear in mind, like one thing from what your favourite half was and issues like that. 

Emma: Yeah, mine additionally was love of studying.

Elsie: Wait, learn them once more. 

Emma: Principally do filo math, which once more, I don’t know easy methods to pronounce that both. That’s what I’m gonna go along with filo Math, timekeeper, focus skilled, deliverer and thinker and I feel deliverer was not in your checklist. 

Elsie: Deliverer, I feel for this reason we’re such crew collectively as a result of I’ve just like the catalyst and the optimist which are completely different and you’ve got deliverer and focus skilled which are completely different and I feel that that’s like so much to supply one another. 

Emma: Yeah. So I feel you’re like, how exhausting can or not it’s? And I’m like, properly, I suppose we’ll simply end

Elsie: I adore it. Yeah, I hope that a few of you’re taking it. I feel it was extraordinarily correct and fascinating. I’m gonna push my husband once more to take it as a result of I simply wanna perceive that little mind. I want I may push, mine’s a screenshot, so I can’t push on what catalyst means. I want I may learn what it meant, perhaps I’ll look it up actual quick. It means you can not wait to start out your venture, you begin it immediately, you’re keen on beginning. That sounds proper. 

Emma: You like beginning and I like ending, so we’re an important crew. I additionally thought it was humorous. So it form of has 4 completely different power households and your issues might be in any of those 4 households and the households are pondering, doing, feeling, and motivating and all of mine are within the pondering and doing. So I’ve no strengths in feeling or motivating, so if you’d like somebody who can encourage you, I’m not that individual. And if you’d like somebody who has loads of emotions, I suppose I’m not that individual both. I don’t know. Clearly I do have loads of emotions, however I don’t know I simply thought that was form of humorous. I do suppose after I’m working or after I’m making an attempt to perform, which doesn’t must be work associated like profession, it may very well be no matter. I do suppose I’m very, let’s do issues like I’ve an inventory. Even in being a mother, it’s not that I don’t inform Oscar how a lot I like him or how proud I’m of him, I inform him each single day how proud I’m of him. However I additionally suppose very a lot by way of, okay, it’s Saturday, what are we going to do? We’re going to go get a donut. Don suppose that’s what we’re going to do.

Elsie: I don’t suppose that’s what it means although, I don’t suppose it signifies that you’re not an emotive individual.I’ll cease in the midst of a venture simply to cry and also you don’t do this. You understand what I imply? 

Emma: Yeah. I imply, I’d actually, however I feel it’s extra of, how do you. I don’t know easy methods to clarify this. How do you want undergo life? As a result of to me, it’s not that I don’t emote or have emotions on issues, I simply don’t suppose by way of my emotions so far as like, what am I going to perform this weekend? Or what’s my life about? I don’t actually suppose by way of emotions or I consider it extra in what I’m gonna do and achieve. I don’t know, however I feel lots of people do this, so I’m not likely certain. I simply thought it was humorous that each one of mine had been very concentrated. I’d like to satisfy an individual who has one power in every of the 4 households, they usually’re this like completely balanced individual, however in all probability that’s not likely even the way it works. 

Elsie: Yeah, mine has 4 colours. 

Emma: Oh, you’re a balanced individual then. 

Elsie: However I don’t really feel balanced both. I don’t really feel extra balanced than you.

Emma: Mine is like all two colours, not one of the different two . 

Elsie: Nicely, I’m grateful in your strengths and I feel it’s type of like Enneagram or something. It’s identical to good to know. As a way to perceive different folks higher. So I feel it’s very useful. 

Emma: Sure, I like something that helps you perceive your self or the world higher. I don’t actually like issues that put us in bins. I wish to make jokes about being a sure method or no matter, however to me that’s simply me being just a little bit self-deprecating for enjoyable. I really don’t actually view it that method, I feel it’s only a instrument for self enhance as a result of I don’t have strengths in these different two areas, I can’t be that method. I don’t really imagine that. I wish to say a joke about it however that’s not really my perception. 

Elsie: Yeah. No, I don’t both. I simply know I don’t take pleasure in ending, however I nonetheless know that I can, and I feel that that’s simply the one distinction. It’s like, for certain I can do it, you understand?

Emma: Yeah. How exhausting can or not it’s? Prefer it’s exhausting, isn’t that what Elwood says? Yeah. I bought into Harvard, prefer it’s exhausting. 

Elsie: Yeah. I wanna watch Legally Blonde, let’s do this film. 

Emma: Yeah, we should always do this for per week we watch. It’s one. 

Elsie: Okay, now it’s time for everybody’s favourite, a joker a truth with Nova. Right here’s Nova. 

Nova: A joke is, what’s a polar bear within the rain? A drizzly bear? 

Elsie: Oh, I like that one. That’s joke. Okay, thanks Nova. 

Nova: Bye everybody. 

Emma: Thanks a lot for listening, we really, deeply admire all of you and all of the emails that you just ship us each single week. For those who wanna help A Lovely Mess listed below are two free methods, I like to simply give these on the ends of episodes. Primary, you possibly can depart us a podcast evaluate, it actually does assist us develop. They present up within the Apple areas or wherever you hearken to podcasts, so it means so much and two on our weblog, both a Lovely Mess or Childhood Magic. Anytime you see a recipe, when you may depart a 5 star evaluate, assuming that you just’ve accomplished it and you understand that it’s good, that is also a method that helps us develop and helps our blogs develop. So these are simply two free issues you are able to do and we might admire them. And when you do neither, that’s okay too. We nonetheless love you and we hope that you’ve an important week.

Elsie: I see all these opinions although, and I do know that they’re from our podcast, listeners. So thanks a lot.We’ll be again subsequent week with a, you’ve bought mail rewatch, so if you wish to give your self just a little deal with this week in preparation, there may be your warning.

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